Full Figured 8 Read online

  I knew what the sly smile on Ms. Loretta’s face meant. She had moved on from herself to trying to fix me up. I loved the older women in my office but none would accept that I was gay, or that I was perfectly okay being single for as long as I had been.

  The truth was I had been single for longer than normal. I was coming up on five years since my last relationship exploded in my face. I didn’t expect to stay single for so long, but after finding my silver girlfriend I didn’t have a need for a physical one. I was able to focus on me and my art, which was more important than another useless relationship.

  “Yes, Ms. Loretta, we met.”

  “I can tell she’s the quiet one.” Loyal stared at me.

  I felt uneasy again. I stood up.

  “She’s not quiet, just give her time,” Janice added. “She’s the life of the party.”

  “Riiggghhttt.” I laughed as I walked away from the hen party.

  I made my way back over to Camille’s desk. I didn’t know how any work was getting done by the laughter coming from her bay area.

  “What are you guys laughing about?” I stood next to her desk.

  “Girl, nothing.” Camille looked at me. “So you got that new dude everyone is lusting over in your bay?”

  “I guess.” I leaned against her wall. “Ms. Loretta and Janice are lusting over him.”

  Camille laughed. “They would sit him next to your gay ass. Probably for the best. I hear he’s got these chicks all open and shit.”

  “Again, I guess.” I rolled my eyes.

  I headed back to my desk. I was eager to get the day over with. I had real work to get back to at my place, and mysterious hands to complete.

  Chapter 3

  My eyes were heavier than normal. I kept dozing off at my desk without realizing it. I knew I couldn’t continue with the long nights. I was spending my nights working on my projects and only getting a few hours of sleep.

  I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned to see Loyal holding a bottle of 5-Hour Energy and a Red Bull. “I figured you needed something and since I didn’t know which you would like I figured I’d let you pick your poison.”

  “Thanks.” I sat up in my chair and took the 5-Hour Energy from him and quickly downed the shot. “Was I that obvious?”

  “Naa, no snoring or anything.” Loyal smiled. He did have a cute smile.

  I looked at the clock. The day was going fast. We were the only late shift of people in our department. Our supervisor and other coworkers had already gone home for the night. I liked it when everyone left. The calls would slow down and it was quiet in our section. I pulled my sketchbook out and turned to an empty sheet.

  “Hey, Rayne.”

  I turned around when I heard the familiar voice. My coworker Kyle walked over into our section. I faked a smile; the last thing I wanted was Kyle in my face. He was sweet, but also a bit creepy. We called him “Myron” behind his back because he sometimes reminded us of Diamond’s stalker in the movie The Players Club. He was nice, but never could take a clue. He was a sad case; not ugly but very sloppy in the way he presented himself. His low self-esteem reeked through, but he would always try to impress the most beautiful girls in the call center by spoiling us with various treats. Even with his weirdness he was a nice guy overall but just needed some work.

  “What’s up, Kyle.”

  Kyle made it all the way to my chair. I noticed he was holding a newspaper rolled up. “I was reading and came across this.” Kyle handed me the newspaper.

  I opened it to see a large article with my picture along with a few others. My eyes widened. I stared at the photo I had taken over a month ago.

  “Time is ticking away I see.” Kyle smiled.

  “What’s that?”

  I looked at Loyal who was attempting to read over my shoulder.

  “Oh nobody told you?” Kyle smiled. “You are sitting next to our artist superstar.”

  “Whatever.” I rolled my eyes as I kept reading the paper.

  “Artist?” Loyal stared at me.

  “Yeah.” Kyle turned his attention to the new guy. “Rayne is an amazing artist. She’s going to be featured in the Best of Memphis show at the Brooks in a month.”

  “Really now?” His eyes were burning a hole in the side of my face.

  I turned my head only to meet his stare right on. He nodded his head obviously impressed by all the boasting Kyle was doing. I didn’t know why I suddenly started feeling uneasy. I focused back on my article. I listened as Kyle continued to sing my praises like he was a proud father or husband. I just shook my head, hoping he would stop at some point. Thank goodness breaks were only fifteen minutes. Finally Kyle headed back to the other side of the office to his cubicle.

  “So that’s what you are always doing in that book.”

  I looked up to catch eye contact with Loyal again. His eyes were fixated on me. The uneasy feeling was settling back over me. “Yeah, but I just sketch a bit while at work.” I stared back at my paper.

  “That is really amazing. So you are like a real-life Picasso.”

  “I wouldn’t go that far.” I picked up my pencil trying not to look back at him.

  “So what is your style?”

  Why was he asking so many questions? I had never wanted my phone to ring so badly in my life. Why did they have to sit him next to me? He’s way too talkative for my liking. Not to mention I, for some reason, didn’t think I could lie to him.

  I didn’t know why but I picked my sketchpad up and handed it over to him. I rarely showed people my sketchpad. I had a thing about people seeing unfinished work.

  Loyal began to turn through my pages. I watched as he studied my sketches like he was at an actual gallery. I couldn’t help but notice his jaw line. His face was chiseled with amazing lines. I could easily recreate his image in clay. His hands caught my eye. I cringed at the sight.

  “You are in total need of this.” I handed him my jar of body butter.

  Loyal looked down at his hands. “Yeah, you are right. I washed my hands in the bathroom and didn’t have lotion.”

  I put a dab of my cream on my finger and wiped it into his hand. The inside of his hands were hard. “Eww what is up with your hands, dude? Do you never use lotion?”

  Loyal laughed. “It’s from working out. I gotta get some new gloves.”

  “So you work out a lot?” I looked down at my stomach. I felt a wave of insecurity take over my body. I pulled down on my shirt trying to camouflage my belly as much as I could.

  “Every day.”

  “I need to be doing the same thing,” I shyly admitted to him.

  “Well, if you ever want to, we can. Just let me know.”

  “Loyal.”

  We both turned around when a woman’s voice called his name. A girl I had never seen was walking up holding a bag in her hand. She wasn’t anything special to look at, dark skinned, so skinny I knew I could probably see her ribs if she took off the dress she was wearing. She was a girly girl with a face full of makeup and heels that looked more like a weapon than shoes.

  Loyal handed me my sketchpad and I quickly turned back to my desk. I began to sketch in my book again while one ear focused on their conversation.

  “I thought you might want this.” The girl handed the bag to Loyal. He looked in it.

  “Oh, sure, thanks.” He opened the Rubbermaid container. I could smell the chicken. It actually smelled pretty good.

  “I made too much last night and I know you like to eat so I figured I’d share.” I could see the girl look at me out of my periphery. “How you liking it over here?”

  “It’s cool, it’s cool. Well yeah, thanks for the food. I’ll bring the container back to you.”

  “You can keep it.” She smiled. “I cook so much I have a bunch of them.”

  The girl finally walked away. I watched as Loyal inspected the chicken and then frowned. He took the chicken out of the container, threw the chicken in the bag, and put the bag in the trash. He looked up at me as I ju
st stared.

  “What?”

  “That is so wrong.” I laughed. “How you gon’ act all happy to get it then throw it away?”

  “I don’t eat everyone’s cooking.” Loyal pulled a familiar green box out of the bag.

  The fat girl in me took over instantly as I jumped up out of my seat. Loyal’s phone rang before I could ask him for some of his Thin Mints Girl Scout Cookies.

  I stood behind his chair while he listened to the customer on the phone. I figured I would sweet talk him the same way I sweet talked my gay male best friend. I put my hands on each of his shoulders and began to massage them slowly. Loyal’s head dropped. I heard a slight quiver in his voice as he struggled to gain his composure on the phone. Not expecting that response I sat back down to let him finish his call.

  Loyal’s chair turned to me the second he said good-bye. “What in the hell?” His voice seemed to go an octave higher.

  “I was just trying to get you to give me some cookies.” I smiled.

  Loyal looked at the box of cookies on his desk. He picked them up and threw them on my desk. “Woman, you can have the cookies. Hell you can have anything if you just do that again. Oh my goodness, I wasn’t expecting that at all.”

  I blushed. “It was just a little massage.”

  “No, wasn’t nothing little about that. You almost made me lose my entire cool on the phone. Damn, girl, what do you not do?”

  I opened the box of cookies and bit into one of the tasty morsels. I glanced down at my stomach. “Exercise.” I frowned. “I guess these cookies are the last thing I need.”

  “No, I don’t think those are diet Girl Scout Cookies.” We both laughed.

  Loyal’s eyes were fixated on me. The few hairs on my arm stood on edge. It had been a long time but I had this strange feeling that he was actually flirting with me.

  “So when do I get to see some of the actual art?”

  Loyal was too close for comfort. I could smell his cologne. He smelled really good. I was becoming suspicious. Why was he sitting so close to me and acting the way he was? He knew I was gay. I know he heard the discussion the other day that Camille brought up about trying to hook me up with a girl she knew. He was listening just like everyone else in my area as I told her that I would never date anyone she tried to hook me up with.

  “Why are you so interested in my work?”

  There was brief pause. Loyal’s eyes locked on me. I couldn’t help but look at him in his eyes. I tried to look away but something was compelling me not to move.

  “Because, Rayne, I find you very intriguing.”

  He didn’t take his eyes off of me. I wanted to look away but the force had me spellbound. The sound of his phone ringing finally broke the connection. I quickly turned back to my desk. I didn’t know what just happened but I didn’t want it to happen again.

  A burst of callers kept us busy for the rest of the night. It seemed like whenever I got a free minute he was on a call. Finally it was time to call it a night. I packed up all of my things while he turned in our paperwork for the day.

  “So what are you getting into tonight?” Loyal asked me as he picked up his keys and fedora hat.

  “Work as usual.” I zipped my book bag and placed it over my shoulder.

  “Cool, cool. Have a good night, Ms. Rayne.” Loyal winked his right eye at me as he walked away from our bay. I got this sudden urge to follow him but I resisted. I grabbed the last of my items and headed out the door.

  I sighed as soon as I got out of the door. I had forgotten to move my car from the end of the parking lot. It was darker than usual as two of the streetlamps were obviously out near my car. I tried to wait a moment in case security drove around but they seemed to be nowhere to be found. I knew I was just going to have to make the long trek.

  “Don’t tell me that’s your car all the way down there.”

  To my right I saw the window of Loyal’s black Camry roll down. I didn’t know why his car surprised me. I had pictured him in something a lot sportier or a large SUV.

  “Yeah, I don’t know what I was thinking.” I walked down the three steps.

  “I’ll give you a ride down. Come on.”

  I could feel my stomach knotting up but I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why. I opened the passenger door and got in. His car looked like it had just left the showroom floor. There wasn’t a single piece of paper out of place. My car was the total opposite; in fact if anyone attempted to sit in the passenger side they would have to move a pile of art supplies first.

  “You know you could move your car down at lunchtime. That’s what normal people do.” Loyal smiled.

  “I know. I was sketching and time got away from me.” I suddenly noticed we weren’t headed toward my car.

  “I’m taking the scenic route.” He smiled again. I couldn’t argue with him considering I was now in his car. To my surprise he drove all the way around our long building in silence. I didn’t know why my palms were tensing up. I rubbed my hands together.

  “Are you cold?” Loyal asked when he saw what I was doing.

  “No, my hand was tensing up.”

  “Carpal tunnel?”

  “No, anxiety from this possible kidnapping.”

  Loyal laughed. He turned the corner and I could see my car in the distance. “I’m not kidnapping you. Just wanted to occupy a little more of your time.”

  “Why?” I turned my body toward him. “Loyal, in the last few weeks I’ve seen I know at least four different girls come to your desk. So why are you attempting to take my time?”

  “I already told you I find you intriguing.”

  “Yeah, okay, I’m intriguing, and I’m also very gay. You know this right?”

  “I’m sorry, was me finding you intriguing the same thing as me trying to hook up with you?” Loyal’s smile faded to a more serious look.

  “Well, I’ve never known a guy try to take a scenic route with a girl he wasn’t trying to get with.”

  “I’m not trying to get with you, Rayne. I just think you are cool as shit and I’d really love to see some of your art sometime.”

  He pulled his car into the spot next to mine. I stared at the side of his face again. Loyal turned his face toward me. I knew why women were so drawn to him; he was beautiful.

  “Thanks for the ride. Sorry about all the other.”

  “It’s cool, Rayne. You get home safely all right? See you Monday.”

  I got out of his car and closed the door. I realized I didn’t have my keys in my hand. I pulled my book bag off and began to rummage through it for my keys.

  “Damn, girl, don’t tell me you don’t have your keys.”

  I felt my keys and pulled them out of my bag. I dangled them in the air and smiled. I pressed my keyless entry as Loyal started to roll his window back up. This unsettling feeling came over my body. I wasn’t ready for him to leave me.

  “Loyal!”

  Loyal stopped his car from backing up. He pulled back up and rolled his window all the way back down.

  “Did you really want to see my work?”

  Chapter 4

  I couldn’t believe this man was in my place. I stood back against my door as Loyal walked around my art space. I watched him study my projects that I had finished in my gallery living room in my house. I felt uneasy. The only people who ever came in my apartment were close friends and family. Now I had someone who was practically a stranger staring at my work.

  “I love this one.” Loyal pointed to a painting on my wall.

  I smiled. “That’s one of my favorites too. What do you see in it?” I loved asking people that question. The abstract art could mean anything to anyone but it was fun watching people attempt to see what I was seeing when I created it. I noticed that Loyal wasn’t smiling.

  “I don’t see anyone or any specific thing. I just see ... sadness.”

  My eyes widened as Loyal broke my piece down like he was a professional.

  “The blue swirls start to crack bleedin
g in red. I think that’s a broken heart. And the black coming in at the end, to me that’s just emptiness. There is no more heart at all, just darkness.”

  I was speechless. This man read my painting to the tee.

  “Who was it?”

  “Who was what?” I turned my head toward him. Loyal was staring at me with his same intense glare.

  “Who broke your heart?”

  I took a step back. No one had read my painting perfectly before or could tell that it was completely about me.

  “I want to show you something.” I pulled the door to my working space open. I turned the light on and watched as Loyal’s eyes popped as he walked into my studio. I could tell he was surprised I was allowing him to see this space.

  “You sculpt, too.” Loyal walked straight toward the torso and hands I had been working on.

  “Yeah, it’s something I’m working on. I don’t really know where it came from. I just got this image in my head and felt like I needed to sculpt it.”

  “That is so damn bad ass.” Loyal stared at the clay.

  I walked closer to him. “Thank you. I don’t really know what I’m going to do with it. I can’t seem to get past this part of it.”

  “You blocked or something?” Loyal looked at me.

  “It came in a dream and I haven’t had the dream again. So yeah, I guess you can call it blocked. Plus it’s not anything like the other stuff I’m working for the show so I probably shouldn’t be focused on it anyway.”

  I walked over to the other side of the room and pulled a white sheet off of a canvas I had been working on.

  “Can I say something to you without you getting offended?” Loyal’s voice echoed through the room. I could hear his footsteps coming toward me.

  “What’s up?” I didn’t know why I couldn’t bring myself to turn away from the painting. I stared at it even as he came closer and closer. Loyal was standing right behind me, so close I could almost feel him.

  “You are blocked because you need some sex.”

  “What?” I still couldn’t turn to him. I felt him take another step closer. He put his index finger on the nape of my neck causing my body to shiver.